Category: Divorce

While people divorce for their own reasons, larger themes emerge. Though the specifics may vary in each case, there are common reasons for divorce.

Filing for divorce represents a difficult but often necessary choice. It requires thought, consideration, and support. Many people grapple with this major decision, feel isolated, and struggle with their reasons for wanting to end a marriage.

If this is you, don’t worry, you’re not alone.

5 Most Common Reasons For Divorce

Most often, you don’t divorce for a single reason. One or the other may be the biggest reason you end a marriage, but in most cases, multiple problems combine to destroy a relationship. There is a lot of crossover, and these issues often combine to make others even worse.

1. Communication

Communication issues are often one of the first signs of marital trouble.

These problems range from trouble expressing your feelings to a complete lack of interaction.

If you and your spouse struggle to communicate, it’s often beneficial to seek outside help. Couples counselors or therapists may offer advice and help overcome communication challenges.

If your communication difficulties are insurmountable and you decide to end your marriage, you must remain civil during your divorce. Inflammatory and hurtful interactions complicate many cases and make the entire process more problematic.

2. Financial Stress

Finances are often among the most contentious topics in a marriage. Money woes are also cited as a common reason for divorce.

Money problems kill more marriages than almost any other factor.

Financial issues often compound stress and push couples past the point of reconciliation. If you are considering divorce due to financial challenges, take the time to educate yourself before making a final decision.

Not only is divorce expensive, but it also impacts your finances in many other ways. You may have to move, cover all the bills from a single paycheck, or pay child or spousal support. It even changes how you file your taxes.

It’s important to understand the facts before you file. If you have questions regarding money and divorce, speak with a family law attorney with experience in divorce. They’ll help assess your situation and advise you on how to proceed.

Related Reading: 8 Signs They May Be Hiding Assets

3. Infidelity

Adultery is painful and destructive. Along with money problems, infidelity is one of the most common reasons for divorce.

Some marriages can withstand cheating, however, many can’t.

If infidelity motivated you to consider divorce, working with a therapist can be beneficial. Trained counselors can help you work through emotional issues and evaluate whether or not your marriage is repairable or if divorce is truly your best option.

While it ruins many relationships, infidelity doesn’t impact the process as much as many people expect. Washington is a no-fault state. This means neither party officially bears responsibility for a failed marriage.

Even though Washington is a no-fault divorce state, if adultery impairs parenting ability, negatively affects your finances, or has a proven tangible influence, it may factor into the final divorce settlement. May is the keyword.

4. Addiction

Battling addiction increases the odds that a marriage will end in divorce. Many studies show statistical evidence that marriages struggling with dependence issues are exponentially more likely to end this way.

Be it alcohol, drugs, gambling, or something else, such compulsive behavior often destroys a marriage.

Addiction usually doesn’t appear alone. It often leads to communication issues, such as when your spouse hides their affliction. If your partner pilfers your bank account for a fix, that also causes money problems. Drugs and alcohol frequently also lead people to make poor decisions, like cheating.

These are serious issues that shouldn’t be taken lightly. If you and your spouse deal with addiction, it’s vital to get the necessary help. This may mean counseling or rehab, or talking to a divorce lawyer.

Educate yourself on how your unique circumstances affect your divorce case. This enables you to protect yourself and make the best decision for you and your family.

Related Reading: How Does Marijuana Use Affect Custody?

5. Differences in values

People change and evolve over time. When it comes to couples, they don’t always move in the same direction. Or maybe what began as a difference of political opinion or belief you thought wasn’t a big deal, became one.

Our values and beliefs are deeply embedded in who we are as a person.

Couples often realize after marrying that their values and belief systems are incompatible. You may have looked past something because you were so in love and excited to begin a shared life. Later, once that’s faded, you may not be able to overlook an issue you once did.

Or perhaps, after years of marriage, you look at your spouse and don’t recognize the person you see. This incompatibility also often leads to conflict and ultimately leaves couples headed in different directions.

These irreconcilable differences are common reasons for divorce.

Whatever your reasons for divorce, it is important to understand how they may impact the process. Some cause more of an uproar than others. Know your rights, understand how your circumstances affect your case, and learn as much about the process as possible. This is a tough decision, but one that hopefully helps you find happiness in the future.

If you’re going through a divorce, you may want to hold off making major purchases until the process is over. Here’s why.

Divorce can be intricate and tricky. Especially regarding the division of property. Different states handle this part of the process in different manners.

Can You Make Large Purchases During A Divorce?

When it comes to breaking up assets, Washington, for example, follows a community property model. Resources, or debts, are split equitably between both parties.

As this is the situation, you may want to delay making any big purchases until you finalize your divorce. Such spending often has a substantial impact on your divorce settlement.

Community Property, Major Purchases, And Divorce

Community property is a fairly straightforward concept. In this mode, the state considers all assets acquired during a marriage, even things held in one individual’s name, as the property of both spouses.

In the case of divorce, this means that it can all be divided in an equitable fashion between both of you.

This doesn’t mean an even split or that everything is doled out 50/50. Ideally, the division will be handled so each party comes out on a relatively even footing.

Spouses work with each other, with mediators, or with the court, to agree on how to divvy up the shared assets in a fair and balanced way.

Related Reading: Dividing Debt In Washington State

If You Make A Purchase During Divorce

Divorce comes with many expenses. This includes attorney’s fees, court costs, changes in tax status, and more. There are, however, other expenditures that also occur.

If you make a big purchase while your divorce is pending, in some circumstances, under community property statutes, this may be included when it comes to the division of property.

Various factors come into play in this ruling, like financing, where the funds to make the purchase originate, and what you buy.

Depending on what you purchase, it may even look bad for you in the eyes of the court. For instance, if you’re fighting about things like child or spousal support and claim you can’t afford to make payments, buying expensive items raises questions.

Can You Buy A Car During Divorce?

Maybe you need a new car to shuttle the kids around. Or maybe a move results in a longer commute and you need a vehicle with better gas mileage.

It’s one thing if you upgrade to a safer, more reliable car in which to transport your children or get to work. But If you run out and drop a bunch of money on an unnecessary car, however, you’ll have some explaining to do.

Related Reading: No-Fault Divorce: What It Means For You

If Your Spouse Makes A Purchase During Divorce

Just as any big purchases you make may impact your divorce proceedings, those made by your spouse can have a similar effect.

If your soon-to-be ex-wife claims she needs spousal support, but buys an unnecessary or impractical new car, or something of that ilk, it may reflect poorly on her.

If you worry about your spouse spending communal money on big-ticket items from joint accounts, it may be possible to prevent this. In some cases, the court implements a temporary financial restraining order.

While this measure still allows for the purchase of normal, regular necessities, when it comes to more substantial expenditures made from shared funds, it requires approval from both parties.

Related Reading: Rebuilding Finances After Divorce

The Impact Of Purchases Made During Divorce

The fact that Washington is a community property state often impacts how the court views purchases made during the divorce. Where the money spent comes from also colors how they look at and classify purchases.

If you or your spouse use shared funds to pay for an item, it will likely be looked at as a community asset and may be taken into account when the court rules on the distribution of property.

What this usually means is that, if your spouse spends a significant sum on material goods, you will likely be given a larger portion of the remaining assets in order to offset the new acquisition.

The opposite may be true if you are the one spending money in this fashion.

While this is the case if a purchase is made with joint funds, if you use separate assets, the court may approach the item differently.

For example, if your spouse uses premarital reserves, the court will most likely view this as an independent property.

Along the same lines, after establishing a date of separation, the law considers each spouse’s income an individual resource. Any purchases made with that money will likely also be looked at as autonomous.

In Washington, however, the court does have the power and authority to divide such separate property. This occurs when trying to achieve a more equitable end result.

Related Reading: The Average Cost of Divorce in Washington

Financing Purchases During Divorce

Most major purchases are financed. While it looks like your spouse went on a reckless spending spree during your divorce, maybe they didn’t.

Whether or not financed purchases factor into the division of property varies a great deal on a case-by-case basis.

If a down payment came from joint funds, the court will likely consider this when splitting up assets. It may be viewed as pre-divorce property and treated as such.

On the other hand, if that same down payment came from an individual source, that changes things. The court may opt to ignore this and award the item in question, and any future payments, to the purchaser.

Related Reading: How to Protect a Business in Divorce

Refinancing and Divorce

It’s always worth noting that divorce does not change any loans or contracts you and your spouse entered into while married.

If you bought a car or house, have regular payments, and both of your names are on the financial documents, the terms still apply equally to both of you. Just because you split up doesn’t automatically alter any preexisting deals.

In the division of property, one party may be ordered to take care of a particular payment. Your name, however, remains on the record.

In situations like this, if your spouse is awarded a house, car, or another high-value item you’re still paying off, your best bet is to have your ex refinance and remove your name. Any missed payments while your name remains on a loan impact you and your credit score. Even if the court orders your ex to make them.

People often write the requirements into the final divorce agreement. Some divorce decrees specify that you or your spouse needs to rework a particular loan by a specific date.

However, don’t take this for granted. Just because the court orders it, doesn’t mean your ex always makes payments or refinances loans. If they don’t, it can come back to bite you. This has a big impact on your finances, so make sure to keep an eye out.

Related Reading: Who Pays for College After Divorce?

Understand the Impact

While it will likely be necessary to make some significant purchases during your divorce, understanding how they may influence the process is important.

Remember, if you buy something during your divorce, in Washington, there is the possibility of losing it in the distribution of property.

There are ways to ensure that such purchases cause as little havoc as possible. It’s simple, really. Stay away from impulse buys, think spending through in a calm, logical manner, and stick to necessities.

If you absolutely must buy a big-ticket item with community funds during the divorce, talk to your attorney or work out a deal with your spouse.

Related Reading: Rebuild Finances and Protecting Your Credit Score During Divorce

Divorce gets complicated and stressful in relatively short order. There’s a lot to consider. Collaborative divorce, mediation, a do-it-yourself approach. These elements all add unexpected wrinkles. But what if you can’t find your spouse?

Can you still divorce if you don’t know where your spouse lives? How do you end a marriage if you can’t find your soon-to-be-ex?

Luckily, you do have options.

Fortunately, Washington is a no-fault divorce state. This means the government can’t and won’t force you to remain married. It requires a few additional steps, but it is possible.

Can You Get A Divorce If You Don’t Kow Where Your Spouse Is?

Yes, though this makes things trickier. Fortunately, you can proceed with a divorce if your spouse is MIA.

In Washington, you need to initiate a case with the courts. This is the first step no matter the situation.  It’s the next step where things become more complex.

Once you file the initial divorce paperwork, you must serve the other party. It’s easy to see how you might have trouble with this if you can’t find your spouse.

Still, you must try.

You need to do your due diligence in attempting to locate your spouse. Put in the leg work and make an earnest, good-faith effort. Once you exhaust all possible avenues, then the case can move on.

It’s important here to document your efforts. You need to prove to the court that you tried.

Collect evidence that you put in the time and effort. If you hire a private investigator, keep records. Check their last known residence and last known employers. If you request DMV records, save them. Keep track of all your moves.

Related Reading: How Do I File For Divorce In Washington?

Motion to Serve by Publication

After exhausting all possible ways to find your spouse, and documenting your quest, then the time comes to move forward.

If you can’t locate the other party, you file a “motion to serve by publication.”

Before you submit this, however, the court must approve this measure. Hence, why you need to show that there are no other options.

Once the court gives you the go-ahead, you then place a public notice of your intention in an acceptable outlet.

This usually means a local newspaper or one where your spouse was last known to live. Most publications like this have a section dedicated to legal notices of this sort.

Once you publish this notice, if you still receive no response after the allotted time, you move on by filing a “motion for default.”

Related Reading: Jurisdiction: Where You File For Divorce Matters

Motion For Default

When you can’t find your spouse, filing a motion for default is the next step.

After you’ve shown that your spouse is nowhere to be found, and that you put in the effort to find them, this asks the court to grant you your divorce.

If the court approves this measure, it essentially means they grant all your requests. You generally receive everything you asked for in the original divorce petition because no one showed up to oppose it.

Even though this sounds fairly straightforward, you still may want to consult a divorce attorney. They’ll guide you through the process and make sure you check off all the right boxes.

You don’t want to put in a ton of effort only to have a judge deny your motions.

Or worse, you don’t want to do a half-hearted search and have your spouse show up at the last minute to derail your plans.

Like most things in divorce, if you’re going to do it, do it right the first time. The effects of ending a marriage last for years, if not longer. This isn’t the time for haphazard shortcuts.

Related Reading: My Ex Won’t Follow The Divorce Agreement

The notion of the “best” divorce attorneys is a subjective matter. Each case is a different endeavor, with particular requirements and parameters. There are, however, common qualities that often combine to make a good divorce lawyer.

One of the most important decisions you may make during this process is hiring a lawyer to represent you and your interests. More than finding what someone else thinks is the best divorce lawyer, you should search for one who best fits the needs of your case.

Related Reading: The Average Cost of Divorce in Washington

What to Look For In A Divorce Attorney

As we said, it’s most important to find representation that suits you, your case, and your specific circumstances. It can be a daunting search. In the end, however, choosing the right lawyer for your situation will be well worth the time and effort.

At Goldberg Jones in Seattle, our managing attorney plays matchmaker in a way. He pairs clients with the lawyer he believes to be the best fit for their situation.

While each case is unique, there are qualities that great divorce lawyers have in common. This list is far from exhaustive, but here are qualities to consider when looking for representation.

Related Experience:

Everyone has to start somewhere, but with a matter as important as your divorce, you want to put yourself in sturdy, practiced hands if possible. Knowing your attorney has experience with the distinctive elements of your case can be a huge comfort.

Trusting that your lawyer has seen similar situations before and is well aware of how to proceed goes a long way toward easing your stress level and soothing your state of mind. For example, if you have custody issues, look for an attorney with experience in that area.

Good Communication Skills:

There will likely be a great deal of back-and-forth between the two sides during your divorce. Your attorney needs to sit down with you, hear your wants, desires, and needs, and communicate them to the other side in a clear, concise manner.

Listening skills, confidence speaking in public, and being able to accurately convey information and articulate your stance are essential parts of this process.

People Skills:

Going hand in hand with strong communication, the best divorce attorneys need to employ excellent interpersonal and social skills. Divorce is an emotional situation. Tempers flare and things quickly become tense and heated.

Depending on how contentious the proceedings become, the ability to maintain composure, calm intense feelings, and retain an even, professional demeanor and civility in tough times all come into play. Being a people person helps smooth out these tense interactions.

Analytical And Research Skills:

Preparing a legal strategy is complicated. Each case involves a large volume of facts, documents, records, and more. Your lawyer needs to absorb and interpret all of this material.

From there, he or she must organize the information, distill it down, and determine the best way to move forward.

Being able to make sense of all of the pertinent factors, how they impact the divorce, and to quickly and effectively research the legal questions in play, are important attributes for the best divorce lawyers to possess.

Judgment:

With the massive amount of information divorce attorneys ingest, processing everything logically is also key. This becomes crucial to developing a strategy.

Being able to critically examine the particulars helps when it comes to identifying potential weak spots in an argument, both yours and theirs, and reinforcing your bargaining position.

Impeccable judgment comes into play in decision-making. There will often be little time for indecisiveness, and your best interests hang in the balance of each choice.

Creativity:

As much as logical thinking, judgment, and analytical skills figure into your divorce proceedings, creative problem-solving and the ability to improvise on the fly are also important qualities to look for in a divorce attorney.

Problems and roadblocks appear out of nowhere. Great lawyers possess the ability to think on their feet and present innovative, rational, reasonable solutions when the need arises.

Dedication:

Even in the simplest cases, divorce is not a quick or easy process. Depending on the situation, you may be in for a long, drawn-out legal action.

The best divorce attorneys will be dedicated and willing to put in the time and energy to see it through. (Even just becoming a lawyer in the first place shows a remarkable level of commitment.)

Cases often involve long hours of deliberation, in-depth research, and extended mediation sessions. This requires a great deal of perseverance on your lawyer’s part.

Competitiveness:

Divorce isn’t always hyper-contentious, but even in the best of times, if both sides enlist the help of an attorney, there’s likely at least some degree of conflict.

Your lawyer’s job is to represent your voice and interests and to ensure as many of your conditions are met as possible.

In this situation, a little competitive spirit and a hate-to-lose attitude may not be the worst trait. We like to use the term, ‘appropriately aggressive’. It’s important to know when to fight, but also when it might be better to ease off the throttle.

Every divorce is different. The best divorce attorney for you may not be the best divorce attorney for everyone else.

Circumstances and the specifics of your situation will likely influence what you look for when seeking out representation, but many great family law practitioners do share these common traits.

Related Reading: Protect Your Business in Divorce: What You Should Know

Ending a marriage has a massive impact on almost every aspect of your life. In one fell swoop, marital status, living situation, the time you spend with your kids, and more change drastically. One area where it often has a devastating effect is when it comes to money. The questions of how to rebuild your finances and credit after divorce often arise.

Does Divorce Hurt My Credit?

The quick answer to this question is that divorce can damage your credit. Especially if you don’t keep an eye on it and let your finances get out of hand.

During the process, you and your ex split up all of your shared assets. Even though the goal is for each party to maintain a lifestyle similar to that enjoyed during the marriage, finances often take a hit.

You may wind up on the hook for a mortgage or car payment. Child and spousal support often factor into the equation. Or it may be as simple as struggling to pay all the bills from a single paycheck for the first time.

Luckily there are some things you can do now, and ways to help rebuild finances and protect your credit after finalizing your divorce.

Related Reading: The Average Cost of Divorce in Washington

Inventory Your Finances

The best place to begin is to take stock of what you have. Catalog your income, all of your expenses, assets, and debts. You can use a spreadsheet, a notebook, post-it notes, or whatever tool you’re most comfortable with.

List all open accounts, assess any investments, and collect what remains of your economic life after divorce. This provides a comprehensive picture of your finances.

Related Reading: Should I File for Divorce First?

Protect Your Credit Score

Your credit score influences everything from applying for home and car loans to renting a new house to career opportunities. It can also take a hit when a marriage ends, so it’s important to keep an eye on it and rehab it when necessary.

As you separate, you and you and your spouse will likely have an overlap period where you both have access to shared money. Make sure to keep a careful eye on any joint accounts or debts.

A recent article from financial experts compiled four helpful steps to protect your credit during a divorce. These measures help guard against sudden drops in your score, your ex racking up secret debt, or surprise unpaid bills on shared accounts.

Related Reading: Is an Inheritance Separate or Community Property in Divorce?

Examine Your Credit Report

Become familiar with your credit. You already should be, but if not, get to it.

This means knowing exactly what accounts link to your credit score. It’s important to know what connects to your spouse and what you have on your own.

Throughout years of marriage, it’s easy to forget about accounts, or not realize how they affect your standing.

The easiest way to correct this is to pull credit reports from the three credit bureaus, Experian, Equifax, and TransUnion. This helps you differentiate between personal and joint accounts.

Note all authorized users on joint accounts. Authorized users can be removed to cut off their access. Taking someone off an account is often fairly easy. This also means your ex’s spending no longer reflects on your credit score.

Related Reading: How Long Does Divorce Take?

Split Joint Accounts ASAP

If you can, work to separate joint accounts early on in the process.

Things often get tense as divorces continue. It may be easier to agree to close accounts, split earned rewards, and the like before things become testy.

If spouses hold joint accounts on credit cards, any missed, late, or non-payments adversely affect both parties’ credit.

Closing out all shared accounts rather than splitting who is responsible for each is usually the best idea according to experts. Even if you decide your ex pays a certain card, missed payments still impact you if you remain on the account.

Be aware that closing accounts does cause a dip in your credit score.

However, this is usually only temporary and should bounce back once you open and use new accounts. It’s also key to be consistent and on time with payments. This helps ensure your credit score remains as strong as possible.

Related Reading: Dividing Debt In Washington State

Contact Your Creditors

Another step: contact your creditors to let them know of your change in marital status.

Before closing joint accounts, credit card companies require you to pay off any remaining balance. If you owe nothing, you and your ex can simply shut it down.

If you still owe, you may have to discuss payment plans, refinancing a debt into one person’s name, or transferring the balance to an individual account. You and your ex may be able to agree to sell off an asset to pay what you owe.

Whatever system you work out, it’s always best to get the terms in writing. Always.

Related Reading: Sweat Equity in Divorce

Freeze Your Credit

Freezing your credit is an extreme step, but one that might be necessary to protect your credit score. Especially if you have concerns about your spouse opening new accounts in your name without your consent.

Freezing credit simply means no one can open new lines of credit in your name, not even you. It’s free and all you need to do is contact the three credit bureaus. You can freeze your credit for a specific amount of time or indefinitely while you get your situation in hand.

Related Reading: How the Division of Property Works in Washington

Create A Balanced Budget

Once you have a handle on your assets and obligations, the next step to rebuilding finances and credit after divorce is to balance your budget. Monthly expenses change after a marriage ends. Knowing what comes in and what goes out is key.

It’s important to track your expenses and be aware of how much you spend, and where.

You can use a simple Excel spreadsheet, but there are many online tools and apps available as well. And more pop up every day. It’s all about finding one that works for you and, most importantly, that you will use.

Related Reading: Contested Versus Uncontested Divorce

Financial Safety Net

Having a financial safety net is hugely important now that you’re single. Many experts suggest having a cushion of at least three to six months’ worth of living expenses set aside just in case. This provides a buffer in case of an emergency.

That’s great if you can pull it off, but it’s also a substantial chunk of change and many simply can’t pull it off.

Still, set aside what you can in case of the unexpected. Many banks and credit unions offer free initial consultations with financial planners. This may be an option worth exploring to assess your current finances and establish goals to rebuild your finances and credit after a divorce.

Related Reading: Dividing a Home in Divorce

Prioritize Expenses

Similar to budgeting, you should also establish or reestablish financial priorities after a divorce.

• What are your most important expenses?
• Where can you trim the fat?
• Do you need to build up your retirement or invest in your children’s college fund?

These are a couple of common questions to ask yourself, but there are many others.

Figuring out what’s most pressing and important helps provide an economic roadmap and show you where you need to focus, and where you don’t.

Related Reading: How Mediation Works in Divorce

Examine Your Taxes and New Filing Status

People often fail to account for taxes and their impact in the wake of divorce.

Some assets received in the division of property are subject to taxes and fees. But the biggest way divorce impacts your tax future is in your filing status. You’re no longer married, after all, so you don’t get to file as such.

Moving forward, you may want to change your withholdings or even alter your investment strategy depending on the impact. Knowing how your taxes change is also a key step to helping rebuild finances after divorce.

Related Reading: How Is A Business Handled in Divorce? Can You Protect It?

Make A Clean Break

Once you finalize the divorce, it’s important to make a clean break moving forward.

As we said, deal with any joint accounts. If your spouse runs up debts on a shared credit card, that may hurt your credit. Creditors may even come after you for payment.

In the division of property, it’s common for one spouse to get things like a car or home. But what many people fail to realize is that divorce doesn’t automatically alter any financial agreements you entered into while married.

Make sure to remove your name from any applicable loans, mortgages, titles, or deeds. If your ex misses payments and your name is still on the paperwork, it can come back to haunt you.

No one wants to start in a hole trying to rebuild finances after divorce, so do what you can to protect yourself now.

Related Reading: Breaking Down Divorce Rates By Generation

Have A Plan To Rebuild Finances After Divorce

Making a plan goes a long way towards helping rebuild finances after divorce. Take any of these strategies, among many others, and draw a roadmap of where you want to go and how to get there.

Some people accomplish this on their own, while others enlist the services of financial professionals. It often looks like a daunting or overwhelming task, but it helps to have a concrete plan to look at.

Many steps go into trying to rebuild finances and credit after divorce. These are just a few. What you can accomplish depends on your resources, abilities, and circumstances. But you don’t have to be in a monetary hole forever.

Related Reading: Splitting Debt in Divorce

Going to court during a divorce is stressful, hectic, and expensive. Among other things. There are, however, other options besides a trial for ending a marriage. One path many couples choose is arbitration. It can be complicated and doesn’t fit every situation, but it may be right for your case.

What Is Divorce Arbitration?

In family law, arbitration is an alternate dispute resolution (ADR). That’s a fancy way of saying it’s an option besides the traditional method of going to court, presenting arguments, and having a judge rule.

In arbitration, the parties contractually agree to handle the matter privately. The two sides enlist a third-party arbitrator to meet with everyone and decide the issues at hand.

In this way, divorcing couples work to reach terms on child custody, property division, who gets the pets, spousal support, child support, and other topics that arise during the process.

As it is voluntary, both spouses must agree to enter into family law arbitration. No one can be compelled into this undertaking against their will.

When you do sign the agreement, however, it is legally binding. Both sides consent to have their dispute settled in this arena and abide by the ultimate decision.

As with any legal option, it’s likely in your best interest to consult an attorney or experienced professional before entering into any binding agreement. Because it’s not the court, if things aren’t going their way, some people think they can get out of arbitration in the middle.

With a few exceptions, that’s not an option unless the other party approves as well. But if they’re winning, why would they do that?

Also, because it’s not the court, you can’t appeal any rulings handed down. Yet another reason to carefully consider all the options ahead of time.

Related Reading:  Are Divorce Records Public?

How Does the Process Work?

While it has been used for years in various legal proceedings, arbitration has become a popular tool in divorce. Though it’s not a trial, the process does have some of the earmarks of a court proceeding.

Similar to a traditional trial, in arbitration, both sides prepare cases, lay out arguments, and present evidence to support their claims.

Instead of doing this before a judge, they do so in front of an arbitrator, often a lawyer or a retired judge who you pay.

Most likely, if you and your spouse have each retained divorce attorneys, they will decide on an appropriate choice to oversee your case.

Despite parallels, arbitration is usually much less formal than a courtroom setting.

Why Choose Arbitration?

Privacy: One of the big draws of arbitration is its relative privacy. Though court documents will still be public records, the actual proceeding is not public, unlike a trial. It’s just you, your spouse, your representation, and the arbitrator. No need to air dirty laundry in public.

Cost: Though arbitration can still be expensive, it most often costs substantially less than going to court.

Speed: A big part of why arbitration usually costs less than a trial is that it’s often much faster. The process itself doesn’t take as long, and with different, less strict rules and regulations, divorce lawyers often don’t have to spend as much time in preparation.

Flexibility and Convenience: It can take months to set a court hearing. And when that finally happens, they rarely take your schedule into account. Arbitration, on the other hand, can be scheduled at your convenience, when it works best for the two sides. A date can also usually be arranged much quicker than a trial.

Less Formal: Arbitration is a much less formal affair than a trial and has simpler rules. This environment puts some people at ease. It often soothes the heightened tensions of court, gives participants more opportunity to speak up, and leads to the two sides working better together.

Related Reading: What is Mediation? Different Types of Mediation Styles

Why Arbitration May Be The Wrong Choice

In certain cases, arbitration offers significant benefits. That’s not to say it isn’t without potential disadvantages.

The fact that, unlike court, there is no appeal process for unfavorable decisions turns some people off to arbitration.

Especially as divorce cases can be unpredictable, the idea of being stuck with the resolution unsettles some.

Though an arbitration agreement is binding, if your spouse doesn’t abide by it, you may still have to go to court to enforce the order. This takes a lot of time and money, and perhaps a middle step could have been avoided.

An alternative to a traditional divorce trial, arbitration is a good option in certain cases. Though it’s a great choice at times, another option is preferable at others.

As with most legal decisions, it’s in your best interest to consult a divorce lawyer beforehand. Make sure you fully explore and understand all of your options before making such a monumental decision.

Related Reading: A Look At Divorce Rates By Generation

Divorce changes every aspect of your life. Some of these are obvious, like where you live or how much you see your kids, but others are less apparent. One thing that often goes overlooked is how divorce affects health insurance.

How Is Health Insurance Affected By Divorce?

If during the marriage both spouses were on the same health insurance plan, you need to take certain steps.

What If One Spouse Provided All Coverage?

As a separation unfolds, it’s important to maintain coverage. If your spouse provided health insurance to both of you, say through their employer, in order to guarantee there’s no lapse, it’s essential to be proactive.

The good news is that you have options to ensure you maintain your insurance following a divorce:

Request health insurance as part of the divorce settlement. In some instances, there are ways to maintain partial coverage. A judge may require one spouse to continue providing health insurance to the other until they obtain their own. In some cases, the court even orders financial assistance to cover costs.

Continue coverage under your ex’s insurance. This is also known as the Consolidated Omnibus Budget Reconciliation Act, or COBRA. If your ex provided health insurance and works for a company that employs 20 or more people, under federal law, you’re eligible for continued coverage through that plan.

COBRA allows you to remain on your ex’s coverage for up to three years. This becomes void if you remarry before that time or receive health insurance through your employer. or another source. Though it does allow for continued coverage, you pay for COBRA, which comes with a significant cost.

Coverage from your employer. This is usually the best option. Many employers provide some form of health insurance to their employees and foot part of the bill. This option is often significantly cheaper than COBRA, where you have to pay the entire premium. Depending on the coverage, you may also be able to cover your children and family.

Buy an insurance plan on the open market. You also have the option of using an insurance agent in order to sign up for an individual healthcare plan. This may be an option if your employer doesn’t offer insurance or only provides limited coverage.

Related Reading: Personal Injury Settlements and Divorce

How Long Do I Have to Get My Own Health Insurance?

Many insurance providers give policyholders a window of 30 days to report any changes. Notifying the insurance company also helps ensure that there is no gap in coverage. Not only does a lack of health insurance leave you at risk, but it also impacts your taxes.

Related Reading: Divorce or Bankruptcy: Which to File First

What If We Choose Legal Separation Over Divorce?

Legal separation offers an alternative to divorce. It’s like putting your marriage on hold. Both parties live their own lives but remain married in the eyes of the law.

In some cases, legal separation allows a dependent spouse to stay on the other’s health insurance.

Like so much else, this varies from one case to the next. A lot depends on your specific policy and provider. Still, this may be an option if you fit the criteria. It’s especially useful in cases of long-term health issues and may be worth looking into.

Related Reading: How Legal Separation Differs From Divorce

Do My Children Still Have Health Insurance?

Following a divorce or a breakup, the law requires all children to have health insurance if available to one or both of the parents at a reasonable cost. How a judge allocates the coverage remains up to their discretion.

The court may require one spouse to provide all of the protection. That doesn’t mean, however, you have to supply coverage to your ex. In order to ensure there’s no gap, it’s beneficial to deal with this early in the separation.

Related Reading: How Is Debt Divided During A Divorce?